Some of those firsts are going to pitchers who broke out in 2019 — Bieber, Flaherty, Giolito, Lynn, Chris Paddack — but one sticks out as highly unlikely, namely the Orioles’ Milone. The 33-year-old lefty is filling in for staff ace John Means, who is dealing with a bout of arm fatigue, and as you might figure given a rotation that last year turned in an MLB-worst 5.72 FIP to go with their 5.57 ERA (28th) and shed its two other respectable starters (Dylan Bundy, now an Angel, and Andrew Cashner, curiously unemployed after finishing the season with the Red Sox), the pickings beyond that are slim. Milone will be pitching for his sixth team since the start of the 2016 season, having bounced through the Twins, Brewers, Mets, Nationals, and Mariners in that span. As you might guess, he hasn’t exactly had much success lately, with a 5.67 ERA, 5.44 FIP, and -0.1 WAR in 255.2 innings over that stretch; last year, he made just six starts from among his 23 appearances, yielding a 4.76 ERA and 5.00 FIP with 0.1 WAR for Seattle — which, to be fair, surpassed Cueto (0.0, albeit in just four starts since returning from Tommy John surgery) and Eovaldi (-0.3 in an injury-riddled campaign); you can see all of the above pitchers’ 2019 stats on this custom leaderboard. Milone’s start will allow the rest of the Orioles’ rotation to remain on turn, and his workmanlike career gets an unforgettable highlight, however things turn out.

The run-up to this belated restart has, of course, been a particularly grim one due to the coronavirus pandemic, whose shadow will be inescapable this season. Still, Opening Day is traditionally a time of renewed hope, and regardless of how any of these pitchers fare on Thursday and Friday, we could all use an extra dose of that right now.